Confidence isn’t something you have or don’t have. It’s something you build, day by day, experience by experience. Confidence, at its most basic, is really just the willingness to try. Try something new, meet someone new, have a new experience. The first time you try something you learn. The second time, you learn more. When you keep going, keep on trying, that’s when you start to become good at something.  Be willing to sit back and let yourself just experience a thing, get a feel for it, break down some of the illusions you may have been holding about it. 

Let go of the expectation of doing something well the first time you try it. Expectations are the enemy of so many things in our lives. They sabotage relationships, stop us before we even get a chance to learn whether or not we like something, and have us feeling disappointment before we even really try.

If you want to build confidence, start trying new things. Try them a few times. Keep on trying new things, and pretty soon, you will begin to trust yourself more and more. Allow yourself to not be good at things right away. Give yourself a break! And the time and space to fail a few times before you get the hang of a thing! Its how you learned everything else you know. 

As adults we somehow get sucked into the idea that since we are older, we must know all we are going to know, and so we limit ourselves. Our self-confidence slowly ebbs away for lack of practice and lack of evidence that we can still learn and do new things. Get it back! Confidence to try and the willingness to allow imperfection are beautiful traits to have! 

The people around you will appreciate the space you give them to be imperfect as well! You might even inspire someone else to find their new hobby, relationship, or life path, simply because you paved the way for them to feel more confident to step out and try something new! 

You can do anything you set your mind to. Go for it! And don’t give up after a failure or three. How many missed baskets did Michael Jordan have? How many missed notes has Yo-Yo Ma had? Even if that high level of expertise is not what you are aiming for, it illustrates the point! You must allow yourself to fail in order to grow. Have fun with this! Laugh when you mess up, and know that the next time you try, you will be better for the experience! 

All my love,

Carie